Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Epic Fail

I was debating on whether I wanted to post this or not or keep it in my private journal. But, I decided, since I have great friends who will hold me accountable for my actions, I will tell you all.

I was not a very good person the other day. Saturday, May 15th, to be exact. I was waiting in line at Walmart with my mom, brother and his family. In front of us were two ladies buying items. I snubbed them and turned and said something to my mother that I don't appreciate people that are clearly well off, (They obviously had enough money to go and get piercings everywhere and tattoos, but yet they couldn't feed their children, so they recieve help from the government to supply them with baby formula, juices, etc...) I thought that I said it quiet enough so they wouldn't hear me.

Clearly, I didn't. The lady came up to me and said, "Next time, keep your comments to yourself." They walked away and her friend yelled out, "**tch" to me." I raised my shoulders and said that how I didn't care. I didn't appreciate people living off the system so they can go and spend useless money on things like tattoos and such.

When we were getting in the car, the ladies were waiting for us outside Walmart. They drove down the other lane and yelled the same profanities back at me. I didn't look at them,  but shook my head and let my blood boil. It stayed with me all evening long. I held on to that anger.

Did they have a right to offend me? NO.
Did I have a right to judge them? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

I went ahead and did God's bidding. I judged the person. Instead of praying for them and asking God to provide for them and care for them as a friend, I went ahead and thought with my mouth. I am still learning to not be so offensive to people. I don't understand where this is all stemming from-I haven't pin pointed it. But I don't like what I do when I do things like that. I feel horrible afterwards and I KNOW that I was doing wrong, still I went ahead and did it.

It's actions like mine that make people second guess Christians. What kind of model of Christ am I if I go about spouting my tongue off to people? I forget that I am supposed to love my neighbors, pray for them, support them....and here I defend myself saying as to why they shouldn't be doing what they are doing, since I am not doing it....but take a good look in the mirror, Mindy. You are just as guilty as they are.

So, my friends, I feel better getting that of my chest. I confessed my sins and I am looking absolution.


Kaitlyn Luce said...

Thanks for being vulnerable. I feel like we all go through times like that. We either say it out loud, or we think it, and God nudges us just enough to bring us to our knees and confess. I'm sorry the lady was not so nice about what you said, but I'm sure through the experience God will pull the layers back and show you things that will only make you a better person. Strength for the journey!

Ahoy! Thanks for stopping by. Sometimes life should be an open book and here you will find that true. My mind is always on full speed and I will be heading over many waves. I hope this journey is as much of an adventure for you as it is for me~ ~Mindy