Wednesday, March 02, 2011

I am Gomer, Hosea's Wife

If you are unfamiliar with the story of Gomer, here's a quick background. She was a girl with a reputation. Promiscuous or possibly working as a prostitute. But God told Hosea to marry an unfaithful woman. So he did- he married Gomer. And he fell in love with her. But she still continued her bad behavior. Read more about Hosea and Gomer in the bible: Hosea 1:1-3:5.

Hi. My name is Gomer.

Seems we all can relate to Gomer at some point in our life, can we not? We've all had done something in our past that was wrong. Let me tell you a little story...

In the past few months, I have been Gomer more than I care to claim. No, I have not been sleeping around or selling my body. For the record, and I will never been ashamed of it, I am still a virgin and will be until I find the man I will marry. But, like Gomer, I've made choices that I could have changed. BIG choices. I hurt a few people that I care about. Not once. Not twice. But more than that. I kept getting that little niggling, "Don't do it, Mindy. It's not worth it." But I kept retorting back, "Oh, just this one little time will not hurt." And that one little time snowballed and ended up damaging those people emotionally and physically. But I was only thinking of myself and not the other people that I was hurting. And right now, I'm living with the mistakes that I have made.

I had been forgiven in the past by the people that I hurt, but this time, if forgiveness comes, it will take some time I'm sure. And trust and confidence will need to be built. I grenaded that wall down and now, brick by brick, I'm hoping to build it back with those people. I love them dearly. I learned from my mistakes.

And even though I feel like if I were them and I wouldn't ever forgive me, I deep down that God has forgiven me. He is Love. And he loves us unconditionally, just as Hosea loved Gomer even though she continued on her path of wickedness. But, just because God forgives us daily and days are made fresh and new in his love and mercy, doesn't give us free reign to go and continue to do the bad. Sometimes, it's going to take more than once, twice or three times to get it through out thick skulls to NOT do something that could be potentially harmful to you or others. *points to self * case in point. I hurt others over and over again, but this last time was the final time. I learned my lesson. This is an opportunity to learn from the wrongs and grown in character.

Just as God loves us and forgives us, we are to love and forgive others. It may not be immediate like God does, but eventually time will forgive. I need to take the "ME" goggles off and think before I speak or do something. I can stop the cycle.

Hi. My name is Gomer. And I have done things in the past that I am not proud of. But I'm willing to change them.

I just spoke silence with the seeker next to me
She had a heart with hesitant, halting speech
That turned to mine and asked belligerently
"What do I live for?"

I see the scars of searches everywhere I go
From hearts to wars to literature to radio
There's a question like a shame no one will show
"What do I live for?"

We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using people like ladders and words like knives

If we've eyes to see
If we've ears to hear
To find it in our hearts and mouths
The word that saves is near
Shed that shallow skin
Come and live again
Leave all you were before
To believe is to begin

There is truth in little corners of our lives
There are hints of it in songs and children's eyes
It's familiar, like an ancient lullaby
What do I live for?

We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using bodies like money and truth like lies


We are more than dust
That means something
That means something
We are more than just
Blood and emotions
Inklings and notions
Atoms on oceans 


Emily Lynn said...

You wouldn't perchance be caught up on the Rabbit Room, would you? Your timing with this post and the latest song of the day is impeccable.

Mindy said...

Really?! I haven't been to the RR in forever!

Emily Lynn said...

Must have been God then.

Mindy said...

must have been.

Gina: said...

Thanks for posting, this sistah! I too have been feeling like Gomer as of late.

PS- I covet your blog design :)

Mindy said...

You are welcome dear.

PS...i found it on a blogger site :) Plus a bunch of I'm not talented enough to create a layout..heehee

Emily Lynn said...

I'm going to overhaul my blog, make it look spiffy. Sometime soon. Maybe after I graduate. And finish making my wedding tour. And get back from camp.

It WILL happen.

Ahoy! Thanks for stopping by. Sometimes life should be an open book and here you will find that true. My mind is always on full speed and I will be heading over many waves. I hope this journey is as much of an adventure for you as it is for me~ ~Mindy